Melankolisnya diriku…

I found this unpublished post in my draft. It was written on April 25th, 2008 and I don’t know why I didn’t publish it.

Maybe, it’s too personal.

No, it’s too gross! hahaha…

This talks about someone I like and I love (my-ex) from the past.

I would never forget you because I will loose all nice moments we have..

That night when you sang to me the song

That afternoon when you hold my hand and talk heart to heart

That evening when you gave me the rose

Those nights when you drove me all the way to home

The times when you saved me from falling down…

Do you still remember that?

I do, and I miss you so

I would never know how it feels to fall in love if it wasn’t because of you

I never regret to have fall in love with you

It is just… just the time that made me never had you

And I can’t do anything to have you back

The love is still exists… and it hurts much more than I’ve expected

I want to see your face all day

I want you to smile all time

Just for me

You are, someone to me… but not someone just for me

*Tunjuk satu bintang, sayang..Kau kan kubawa kesana.*

See the first sections? It’s so… huahahahahahahahhaa *like the title of this post, how melancholy I am*

Now I always thinking, HOW COULD I LIKE SOMEONE LIKE HIM??? hahaha… really, it’s irrational. Aaaaaand embarassing that I had written something for him like that!!!

***

Kupandangi umbul-umbul Ganesha Futsal League di bantaran parker GSG. Aku teringat dia, apa dia datang ikut pertandingan? Tapi tidak mungkin karena dia bilang dia tidak lolos seleksi. Tapi seandainya ia datang bermain dan seandainya tim ITB salah satunya adalah dia (yang tidak mungkin), apa mereka akan bertemu? Apa reaksi mereka?

Aku tersenyum, aku mencintai dunia yang berbeda. Satunya menggilai futsal, satunya lagi anak band. Mengapa bisa?

“De…”

Kontras. Dan aku mulai mengingatnya, merindukannya kembali… Perih…

“De!”

Suara sayup-sayup memanggil itu lagi. Apa yang dia panggil?

“De!”

Itu seperti suaranya… mungkinkah?

“De!”

Aku berbalik. Dan di sana ia, berjalan ke arahku… tak ada dia yang kurindukan, tetapi setidaknya dia ada…

***

Ah, this one was about my playboy-4-girls-at-once-ex-boyfriend. I supposed to be still with him when I wrote about this (oh yeah I was! Now I remembered…), but why I wrote this was maybe because I had a feeling about being cheated (and proved to be true later when I had broke up with him).

No further comment except I really want to put him in my grudging book like Narumi has in Untouchable dorama


*Dia…

Seperti apa yang slalu kunantikan

Aku inginkan…

Dia…

Temani aku apa adanya

Seakan ku sempurna*

***

Ah, I really totally forget about why I wrote this one. Maybe it’s for someone I hoped in the future

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